This day was the happiest day and the worst day of my life.
My youngest son Bryce, who was only sixteen and his girlfriend, were to have their world and ours changed forever.
What we went thru that day, is so hard to put into words
When you lose a child, its like a hurt that you can't describe
I felt like a piece of my heart just withered up and died Besides mourning the loss of my grandchild,
I also had to watch my child go thru so much pain
As we prepared for the coming of our first grandchild
In my heart I knew something wasn't right, I waited anxiously for him to be born.
When Lane was born, I knew there was something wrong no sound, no nothing came from the delivery room
We found out that he had inhaled and swallowed meconium
When they brought me into to see Lane, it was the hardest thing i had ever done
They handed him to me, and I gazed into that beautiful face and knew I would never get to see him smile, laugh or grow up
A part of me died in that room
Watching the grief on my son's face and his girlfriends face was about all I could take
They let us spend time with Lane before they came and got him and that is time
I would love to have back
We buried Lane in the babies circle, in Knoxville Iowa and we buried a piece of our heart with him.
Sadly to report, Bryce and his girlfriend have broken up since then, being so young with so much happening, they just didn't make it
So we are all trying to help Bryce thru this time, while trying to understand it ourselves
Some days I feel like i'm living in a mirror and looking out at people going about their normal lives, I will never have a normal day again
Bryce and his son Lane
Here are two poems I wrote for Lane when he was born
Lane Allen Orr
As they handed you to me to hold
my eyes filled up with tears,
I had planned on spending lots of time
with you for many years
But the angels came and took you
as soon as you arrived
and I was left to sift through all my grief
which has left me old and tired
To stand and watch my youngest son
lay his first born son to rest
Was one of the hardest days within my life
and has put my faith to test
But we know that your with God today
in the beautiful sky above
Rest peacefully , my precious baby, Lane
I'll see you soon
and know you'll be forever loved
Grandma
Grandparents
Sitting here with my grandson
I sit quietly and my mind strays
As I think of other grandparents
and how they spend their days
Some spend them at the playgrounds
pushing grandkids in the swings
Some lie in the newly mown grass
and listen to little ones dreams
Running thru the tall grass
with butterflies and nets
Catching different kinds of bugs
and keeping them for pets
Getting chocolate cookie kisses
and lots of I love you's
Looking through old pictures
and seeing how much they grew
But sitting here with my grandson
I have no one to hold
The angels came and took him
when he was just a day old
So I visit his little graveside
and I ask our God above
To please keep him in his loving arms
and know that he is forever loved
Aunt Megan and Lane
Click on the above graphic to visit Lane's Online Quilt
The above graphic is a link to another quilt site
This award was presented to me by
Janie
in memory of her grandson
Michael
This award was presented to me by
Shadowree and I thank you very much
Member Of Missing Our Grand Angels Support Group
This is the guardian angel of my site
