Christmas Without You
Our second Christmas
without you Lane, is approaching quickly.
I don't look toward the holidays with the
zest that I used to have.
When we lost you, it seemed like i would
never be happy again.
The first Christmas was spent with putting on
smiles for family members when my heart was
really breaking everyday.
I kept finding myself looking at toys and
baby stuff as I shopped, making me just go home
feeling an emptiness inside.
We didn't put a tree up in our house that
Christmas, instead we spent our day putting a
little tree on your graveside and decorating it
with little bulbs and ribbons.
Christmas is usually spent with people
bustling around talking and laughing, but where
we visit our little angel, its quiet, no sounds
and you can hear the snow falling on the ground
A place where no little child should have to
The holidays left us feeling empty instead of
Now we are approaching our second Christmas
without you Lane, and you know what?
I still feel as empty inside my heart for you
I keep finding myself looking at people that
have little kids that would be about your age
right now, and it really hurts.
We have welcomed a new little grandaughter
into our lives, and I love her with all my heart
But there is and always will be that hole in
my heart that will never heal from the day you
left us Lane.
You would love your new little cousin, she
even looks like you when she is sleeping.
How I wish I could have both of you to hold
People just don't understand the death of a
child unless they have experienced it
A pain that just never goes away
So, I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas,
my little Lane
I know you can't be here with me, but I want
you to know that you will be alive in my heart
on Christmas and everyday
Grandma loves you
Please do not remove the Christmas tree from
it belongs to